Yesterday, I said I was too scared to test. Today, it's all I want to do. It's way too early though - at 5dp5dt I still probably have some HCG left in my system from the trigger shot.
So yesterday I made the decision to start testing Saturday. But when I ran this idea past D, he said I should ask my doctor about it first and get her 2 cents. I'm glad I did that because this was her response:
"Hi Hilary - don't test now as it will be positive because you took the hcg injection. The earliest you could test is about 10 days post-transfer but if it's negative at that time it may not be. Make sense?"
What she's basically saying is that I could test at 10dp5dt (Monday) but it may still be too early, even then. So, much to my displeasure, I will stick to my original test date of next Wednesday - a whole week from today. It's going to be a long wait.
I don't feel ANYTHING. All the things I thought I might have felt a few days ago were likely due to the progesterone. I know it's still early but I can't help but feel discouraged. Part of the reason I wanted to test as early as possible is because I thought it would give me the longest amount of time to recover from the disappointment of a negative test before I have to go back to work.
Yesterday I made a pie chart in Excel to remind myself what 64% looks like. How crazy is that? Truthfully though, it did make me feel a bit better to see our chances of success make up the better part of a pie.
I gotta say, I'm no good at this whole "uncertainty" thing. It's a massive mind f*ck. I need a hobby!
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8 comments:
the uncertainty is the killer, these in-between periods of time are as you say the biggest mind fuck ever.
I never wanna work, socialise, read, nothing - during this time.
Just focus on Wednesday, try to keep busy with totally unrelated stuff, personally I find really stupid comedies the best medicine, a chuckle ALWAYS makes me feel better.
Stay positive, you've come so so so far.
no one is good at this. aaaggghhhhh!
i want to say that wednesday will be here before you know it, but we all that 's a load.
crossing everything i got for ya.
Next Wednesday just happens to be my birthday so I'll be sending lots of good luck and happy vibes your way! XOXO
Got all those crossables crossed ;)
I hate the 2WW. It drives me insane. I think that if I ever do IVF, I will probably be working pretty much the whole time, because maybe that will help keep my mind off of it. I doubt it, though!
One week, girl. You can make it. I believe in you and I am hopeful for the VERY BEST news possible.
You're right. you are waaaaaaaay too early for a (real) positive test and for symptoms, but I know that's impossible to rationalize when you're in the midst of such an agonizing wait. You can do it though!!
Oh, Hilary, no one is good at the uncertainty thing. If we were good at it, IF would be a breeze! :) Just know you're surrounded with warm fuzzy thoughts from all of us.
Waiting and uncertainty are the absolute worst part of this process, at least for me. I do hope that the time flies and that next week brings you some wonderful news! HUGS!
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