A couple of weeks ago, my acupuncturist requested a copy of my chart from my doctor. When I went to my acupuncture appointment yesterday, Dr. S said that he had received the records and wanted to bring my attention to an issue. As it turns out, I had a higher-than-normal result from my TSH (Thyroid Stimulating Hormone) blood test done in June (while I was pregnant). With this new piece of the puzzle, I am now considered to have hypothyroidism. I had no idea. No one ever told me this until yesterday. Why didn't my doctor call me?
I learned that hypothyroidism can cause infertility and early miscarriage. I was devasted. I cried all through my acupunture treatment. Dr. S didn't understand my tears. He said, "This is good news! Now that we know there is a problem, we can fix it!" But I wasn't crying about that. I was mostly upset because I realize now that there is a chance that my previous pregnancy could have been saved and I didn't know it. I know I shouldn't think like that but it's too late. I'm just sick about the whole thing.
I am also upset because this is yet another piece of bad news. I am so angry at my body right now. It's always something, and never anything good. I would love to get good news, just once.
I have been really emotional this weekend, I think due in part to the Clomid side effects. Tears feel really close to the surface.
Plus, I have no idea what my chart is doing. I know BBT charts can vary quite a bit, but my post-ovulation temps don't seem to be going up, they're just kind of level. I wanted so much to wake up this morning with a really hot temp, but it didn't happen.
I am feeling really, really discouraged today.